Spam of the Month

Sure, it's been two months.  But I've been busy.  Mostly reading spam.  Here is the spam of the (last few) months:


Greetings to you,

I am MR, Robert Beck an internationally acclaimed eco-sculptor who creates underwater living sculptures.

I am in search of an dependable individual with a high pedigree to help me handle my personal errands. An individual who can combine the responsibilities of an administrative & personal assistant at his/her spare time.

I need your professional service because i am constantly out of town, The pay will be $500 every week, Your duties basically would be Shopping for gifts, assistance in collection of funds {checks mostly} and disbursing of same.
Instruction's for disbursement would be sent to you, and you will make a report to me also through email daily. This position is open to people of age range 18 years and above and no sign up fee is required.

This is only an introductory e-mail, as time goes on we should be able to arrange a proper meeting to get things started officially.

If you will be available for the tasks, There will some errand you could help with in the next coming days. This will act as a stable foundation to our working relationship.

Kindly provide your contact details as shown on your resume to enable us proceed to next step.

Your Full Name:
Address:
Cell phone number:

Once i have received your response, i will review your details and get back to you with next steps and tasks.

Include your cell number for text messages, Your information requested is needed for my company database as an employee and be assured your information is safe and will not be shared.

Best Regards,
MR, Robert Beck.

For those of you who haven't seen MR, Robert Beck's underwater living sculptures, they are breathtaking.  And not just because they are underwater where there is in fact no air to breath. 

Since the class I teach in the summers is wrapping up in a few weeks (leaving me with just the one job), I sent MR, Robert Beck my personal information.  $500 a week to buy gifts, collect money, and disburse same seemed like a great (and perfectly legitimate) offer.  And I have been told I have the highest pedigree.  AKC level, even.  And his some errand to build a stable relationship seemed reasonable.  Of course I will need to open a bank account with $2,500 of my own dollars to facilitate the buying of gifts, collection of funds and disbursement of same. 

Let me know if anyone wants to see his internationally acclaimed eco-sculptures at the bottom of the fucking ocean.