Toddlers and Tek9's



 

 

Here's a heartwarming story!  Toddlers are shooting themselves and others at a rate of about one a week.

As you can imagine, when this was reported just a few weeks ago, the response was swift and decisive:

The NRA quickly put out a statement: "The only thing that counteracts a toddler with a gun is more toddlers with guns.  We need to arm the preschools."

Fox News added: "This is a direct result of the black lives matter movement.  Liberals are politicizing toddler shootings to push an anti-gun, anti-Christian agenda."

The moderate Republican presidential candidates (one and a half people) declared: "we need to enforce existing toddler gun laws, and look into more mental health screening for two- and three-year-olds."

The wacko Republican presidential candidates (around 19 at last count) countered: "It's not about the guns.  If we took guns away from toddlers, they would kill each other with sippy cups.  We need to eliminate all taxes and regulations.  Oh, and get rid of the Mexicans."

The Republicans in Congress added: "Bengazi!  Bengazi!  BENNNNN GAAAAAAAAAAZZZZII!!!"

It is getting so bad that I am pondering whether I should run for office so that I can take everyone's guns away.  I'm thinking that I could run for Municipal Utility District, or for Hide Inspector. 

My slogan?  "If elected, I will take your guns.  I will send President Obama to your door to personally collect your guns.  And force you to have an abortion (if applicable)."  That might not fit easily on a sign.

Sigh.