On the way to Girl Scout sleepaway horse camp (for the Girl Scouts to learn how to ride horses, not a camp actually for horses), we stopped at a little convenience store and bought Abby some new swim goggles.
They were $2.99, and came with instructions. The instructions had five sections: Adjusting the Head Strap, Adjusting the Bridge Strap, Fitting the Goggles, Removing the Goggles, and Eye Safety Warning. There are also three panels of pictures to demonstrate the Fitting the Goggles.
The Eye Safety Warning included this very important phrase "For Surface Use Only." I've tried and tried to figure out how one might use goggles below the surface, but could only come up with "well, you could swallow the goggles whole."
The instructions also came in (I am not making this up) twelve different languages. "Fitting Instructions" can be translated as:
Comment Mettre Vos Lunsites
Instrucciones de Uso
Bedienungsanleitung
Istrziono
Gebruiksaanwijzingen
Instrucoes de Uso (that one had some funky marks I couldn't reproduce)
Vejledning
and four other languages for which I do not believe my keyboard can simulate. Best guess: Greek, Russian, and two Asian languages.
Very very in-depth instructions that could be read and understood by approximately 91.2% of the planet's population, with pictures for the remaining 8.8% (Swahili, Choctaw, and Antarctican).
The goggles broke upon first use.
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2 comments:
Russell,
I'm surprised their was so little fact checking. Swahili is spoken by 90 million earthlings, and Choctaw at 11,000. Antarctican, also known as Bus (look it up), is spoken by one to four thousand depending on the time of year. With Earth's population at 6,860,700,000 that makes up only 1.3% of the worlds humans, far off your 8.8%.
I expected more of you...
I almost forgot, "Eee" means crap in Cantonese.
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