Kindergarten Hors d'oeuvres

At the beginning of the Kindergarten school year, at the open house, I signed up to help in a variety of ways (OK, maybe two ways). One thing I signed up for was to bring a "Letter Snack" for Alexis' class. You see, each week the class studies two letters, and each week a parent brings in a snack that starts with those letters. For instance, for "A" and "B" week, there could be apples and bananas. I signed up for "K" and "L" week.

I thought I was very smart, because the "K" snack "kiwi" had already occured to me. However, as the week approached, I began to realize how completely out of ideas I was for "L." I was not supposed to bring in anything sugary, so lemonade, licorice, lemon squares and lemon bars were out. I thought five-year-olds would not be so fond of legumes. Lobster is outside of my snack budget, and leeks would just cause them to giggle. So, after much thought, I decided upon lettuce. Kiwis and lettuce, a healthy snack.

I cut them all up, and realized how pitiful lettuce looks as a stand-alone snack. So, I put the kiwis on the lettuce. Better. Perhaps a toothpick to hold it together. Great. Now maybe a touch of prepared wasabi to contrast with the sweet flavor. Finished with a raspberry reduction drizzle. Perfect. They'll love it. The five-year-olds. Hmmm. I considered my audience and went back to the cut kiwis and pieces of plain lettuce.

Still relatively proud of my contribution, I walked into Alexis's class with the snacks in a plastic container. Immediately, a girl looked at the container and announced "I hate salad!"

She was just being honest, as a five-year-old does. I wanted to model truthful behavior, so I replied, "I brought in lettuce, which starts with 'L." As does 'little shit.'"