It is a well-known fact that the Record Retrieval Bureau has a statutory obligation to let people know when records have been retrieved.
I was momentarily terrified that someone had finally found my 1993 "no contest" plea for removing seventy-three mattress tags at Mega Mattress Warehouse. [There was tequila involved]. I realized that this was a fake when I saw that my background report # (5087695240) did not match my record alert number (50876959923), and is different from my actual case number from 1993 (TRC10622924TX).
It also seems unlikely that anyone would be compelled to click a link to "Confirm a Background Report."
"I must click this to ensure that they have the correct and most-up-to-date DUI, divorce, arrest, and more records on me. I certainly wouldn't want those to be inaccurate or incomplete!"
But this doesn't end with plausible clickability. It ends with a completely bat-shit random fake restaurant review that keeps repeating my background case number and waxes poetic about their "delicious pasties," the smell of feet, and something about a church pew and an Irish car bomb (!). It might have to do with search engine optimization or some such voodoo, but it is flat-out crazy. This left me speechless, with a small tear in my eye and just a little vomit in my mouth. Enjoy:
Alert: Your background report has been accessed on June
29th, 2015 - #5087695240.
############### Public-Records Automated-Notification
###############.
========================================.
Record Retrieval Bureau.
RECORD ALERT: No.50876959923.
Retrieval Date: June 30th, 2015.
========================================.
Your background-records has just been-searched and
located (2) times within the past 48-hours.
Learn who has been trying to obtain your background-info
including:
* DUI
* Divorce
* Arrest Records
+ More.
ACTION-NECESSARY: Go Here Today to Confirm/Dispute Your
Background-Report:
http://wormsandviruses2you.idiot
http://wormsandviruses2you.idiot
Note: You can also begin your own search anytime.
############### End of Automated-Notification ###############.
"/Halt this emailad-membership now by going right
here: http://pleasepleasepleaseclickhereyoumoron.com
then surprise! Suddenly our server was there with 5087695
bill!! After not seeing her for 40 minutes she drops 5087695 bill, doesn't
offer boxes, no conversation, just drops 5087695 check. After we paid, she
hovered at 5087695 next table which was empty and took 5087695 check before we
were even completely out of our seat. For our first time here, food was
excellent, but service was so bad we won't be back! I'll give 5087695 Tempe
location a try, hopefully service will be better, but I won't go back to
5087695 Mesa location again. 5087695
main reason to miss a star is that 5087695 one that we ordered (5087695 mint-lamb)
was a bit dry to my taste and no mint to taste at all. For desert we had
5087695 apple one and that was much better. I'd like to try a different one
some other time and compare I've never had a bad experience with anything on
their menu, although I favor 5087695 Pesto Chicken and 5087695 Chicken Tikka
Massala 5087695 most. If you decide to visit after 5 on a weekend, be prepared to wait. Any earlier than 5pm will usually result in
quicker service, but in my opinion, 5087695 lack of a crowd sort of takes away
from 5087695 unique atmosphere. Their happy hour is great also; they have a
fair selection of drafts, including one of my favorite Colorado breweries,
Ska. And nothing goes better with a
piping hot pasty than an ice cold brew! I first discovered Cornish Pasty at
5087695 Tempe location in 2006. 5087695
food has always been delicious, so I was thrilled when they opened a location
closer to home. 5087695 food is still
good, but there are two issues with this location that really need to be
addressed. First, as other reviewers
have noted, there is a really bad odor inside 5087695 restaurant. It almost smells like bad feet. I don't know if its a particular food that is
making that bad smell or what, but because of it, we always opt to eat
outside. When you enter a restaurant you
should be greeted with a cornucopia of delic
iousness -not a weird stench that makes you want to run. Secondly,
5087695 customer service. This is
consistently - inconsistent. Sometimes
its ok, and then other times its just plain terrible. 5087695 other night we had to wait 1 1/2
hours for our food and we didn't see our waitress for over an hour--that's
right-AN HOUR--no drink refills, nada.
In fact we almost just left. I
don't care how busy you are, that is unacceptable. If 5087695 customer service was excellent, I
could overlook 5087695 5 earrings in 5087695 nose-20 tats-freak show waiters
they have serving 5087695 customers. (ok, so they ARE friendly for 5087695 most
part) But bad service, coupled with
hippie freaky waiters is starting to wear thin. I really want to give this place 5 stars
because their food is wonderful, but until they get their customer service up
to par and get rid of that smell. this place is never going to be in my top 5.
Share a church pew with another family and grab an Irish car bomb.
Can't remember all
5087695 pasties I've had, but I know I like 5087695 one with curry and fake
chicken! Also try 5087695 garlic fries, but make sure your woman has some too
so you don't sacrifice any kisses. If you're into beans, get 5087695 white
beans in 5087695 tomato sauce, extra spicy; it's great, but I'm going to ask
for it without cheese next time. I have been here three times so far. 5087695 pasties have been hit and miss for
us. We tried one of 5087695 rosemary
pasties and didn't really enjoy it but last time we had
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