Super Hydrator

Look!  On the running trail!  Is that a superhero?

Faster than someone who is walking!  Able to maintain safe levels of hydration!  Strong enough to carry 40 ounces of water on her butt!  It's the Super Hydrator!

For her birthday, Jill got a hydration belt.  This helps her stay hydrated while running.  Since it weighs an extra twenty-three pounds when the bottles are filled, it also causes her to need more hydration.

It looks a lot like the Bat Belt.  [It also looks like Schneider the super's utility belt, but I'm going with the cooler image].  In addition to the 40 ounces of water she can carry on her butt, the belt includes a grappling hook, a taser, a can opener, zip ties, a small refrigerator, a water desalinization kit, two flares, and a CB Radio (breaker 1-9, this is Super Hydrator.  What's your 20?)

Her friends in her training group worry that with all this extra water she will be drinking, she will have to stop more often for bathroom breaks.  What they don't realize is that on the right side of the Super Hydrator belt, there is an adaptor that you can hook up a catheter and a purifier.  For an extra $119.95, she'll never have to stop again!

So, beware all you villains who wish to keep people thirsty.  The Super Hydrator is out there, somewhere, roaming the trails.  The only warning you will get is a sloshing sound.